Not Gonna Lie...

CALLING ALL READERS!...

and party-goers....my sister, Anna, and I have been working on a new entertaining book that is going to be chock full of great party and hosting advice. But it’s gotten me thinking about parties all the time! That means I’m talking about party ideas all the time and the more I talk with people the more interesting things I learn. So, I thought I’d cast the line out there and ask you all what have been some of your favorite things about parties. Maybe it’s the coolest way to set up a bar, or to serve dinner. It could be an incredible playlist that really got people in the partying mood. Maybe it was the best table setting you’ve ever created, or the biggest most successful surprise party you’ve ever given. Whatever it is I’m dying to know!!!!!!! Tell me, tell me, tell me what makes the parties you’ve loved tick!!!!!!

Wear Out Your Welcome Wagon

            Don’t ya just hate it when you’re entertaining and you, the host, want to leave your own evening?!! Oh, but the guests, the guests are still there and haven’t noticed at all that you’ve stopped being excited and engaged in the conversation, you’ve cleared all the dishes, and you haven’t offered them anything more…what do you do?

 At the next pause in the conversation simply say, “I think I’m going to have to start getting ready for bed. John and I have to be up early tomorrow.”  It might sound a little forward, and of course at one point or another we all have the guest who’s beside themselves for having stayed too long in the first place. And you must reassure him or her that it’s not a problem, you just have to make sure you get enough beauty rest. Or, the guest who keeps talking even after your not so subtle hint, in which case you can be more aggressive by actually rising from the couch or table and beginning your goodbyes. “Jane, thank you so much for coming this evening, we’ll have to do it again!”

 Remember, as long as you’re earnestly smiling and thanking your guests for coming, you won’t come off as rude.  

Preparing For A Big Party

 Things to think about when it comes to throwing a big party:

 

1. Invites- Your guest list is your responsibility. You have control over who enters your party. If people show up with uninvited guests then just say, “I’m sorry I can’t accommodate more than I planned for.” Let it be the person who brought the uninvited guests problem.   
2. Your front door- If you’re really worried about who might walk in then hire a doorman for a night. My neighbors used to do this and it really worked for them.
3. Put it away- Before anyone even thinks about setting foot inside, put away anything breakable, valuable or sentimental. I had a good friend clear her entire place before throwing a new years party. It made a huge difference for her roommates and her.
4. What to serve- Before you go out and provide a ton of booze and food for a party think about whether these are the people you really want to spend the money on. It sounds ratty, but I’d rather invest in good stuff for smaller or even just a more controlled atmosphere. If I’m having an open door party where anyone can waltz in, I’m sticking to beer, or even b.y.o.b., and probably no food.
5. Stay sober- I’m not saying you can’t have a drink or two, but if you’re the host and there’s no one else to play crowd control, then you need to make sure you’re sober enough to handle anything that could happen. This will also allow you to be there to shut the door at the end of the night. Passing out, or leaving your own party means you could wake up with a multitude of issues the next day.
6. You have control- If you see things going on that you don’t like, ask those doing them to stop and if they don’t force them to leave. I know it doesn’t sound like fun at all, but truly people who are drunk and being stupid are only going to ruin, you time, your place and your guests’ fun, so hold firm. A friend of mine caught two guys about to tag the wall outside her apartment during a party and my 110lb friend dragged them both down and out of the building. You can do it.
7. Clean up- If something gets spilled clean it up as soon as you can, you won’t run the risk of stains and smells setting in. If things did get ridiculous and you’re disappointed in your friends’ behavior know that you can always ask politely for them to help with the cost of damages, but the nicer you are about it, the more likely someone is to help.
8. Enlist help- If you can’t hire someone, then before the party starts ask a couple of your nearest and dearest to help you out with things like crowd control, and clean up. A truly good friend will be more than willing to help out.

Party Hangover From Hell- You Be The Judge

WOAH NELLY I must advice those with weak constitutions to avert your eyes the following is not for the faint of heart or pretty much anyone who doesn’t like dirty language and crude, lewd, or crass references well none of the above actually seem to go as far as need be, but you’ll see what I mean if you dare go farther. I just want to say, you’ve been warned…

I had an interview request today that blew my mind. In fact, it blew all minds here at EPI to the point where we thought it might be a hoax, but the reporter assured me it’s quite real.

Parties. We all love ‘em, big, or small, family, or friends any combination you’d like, it doesn’t matter cause most parties are fun. Why? Because you get to let loose a little, see people you care about and be merry! Parties however, are also a lot of work. If you’re not willing to put in the work then my guess is that one of two things will happen a)your party will be a dud, b)things you’ve never even thought of may very well ensue creating the worst non-alcohol related hangover you’ve ever had...

And that’s just what happened to this woman. Please read the following link before continuing. In fact I might even just let you, my dear readers, come up with etiquette suggestions of your own for this one and post my thoughts tomorrow…again you’ve been warned…

Now that you've seen not only the party/mess that this hostess is speaking of, but her request for reparations, I'd like some opinions please.  The question the reporter asked was "Is this how people go about asking friends for reparations these days?" and a few others...Now you be the judge I want to know what you think!

Emily Post Said:

For those of you fretting about your holiday hosting I hope this puts you at ease.  In Emily Post's own words here is the heart of entertaining...

The Atmosphere of Hospitality

The atmosphere of hospitality is something very intangible, and yet nothing is more actually felt--or missed.  There are certain houses that seem to radiate warmth like an open wood fire, there are others that suggest an arrival by wireless at the North Pole, even though a much brighter actual fire may be burning on the hearth in the drawing room of the second than of the first.  Some people have the gift of hospitality; others whose intentions are just as kind and whose houses are perfection in luxury of appointments, seem to petrify every approach.  Such people appearing at a picnic color the entire scene with the blue light of their austerity.  Such people are usually not masters, but slaves, of etiquette.  Their chief concern is whether this is correct, or whether that is properly done, or is this person or that such an one as they care to know?  They seem, like Hermione (Don Marquis's heroine), to be anxiously asking themselves, "Have I failed to-day, or have I not?"
    Introspective people who are fearful of others, fearful of themselves, are never successfully popular hosts or hostesses.  If you for instance, are one of these, if you are really afraid of knowing some one who might some day prove unpleasant, if you are such a snob that you can't take people at their face value, then why make the effort to bother with people at all?  Why not shut your front door tight and pull down the blinds and, sitting before a mirror in your own drawing-room, order tea for two? (Etiquette, 1922 Edition)

She's got bite to her tongue but, she is still the epitome of all things good mannered.  Enjoy hosting your  holiday party, accept that  you won't be able to control every single detail.  And that what your guests look for most is to have a good time (not whether the shrimp tail are on or off). 
Anyone who does scrutinize or pooh-pooh you for such a mundane detail doesn't understand the heart and soul of entertaining.  Pop a bottle, eat a cookie, and have some fun!    

Girls' Night At Jenny's House!

Girls’ Night

Last night I went to girls’ night over at Jenny’s house. We tend to have a pretty laid back invite for these things and throw them together last minute. How last minute? Put it to you this way. I called the store where four of the girls going to girls’ night work together at 5pm the night of the party to find out the following:

 When: 7:30
Where: at Jenny’s house
What: we’d be doing a pizza night.
My job: bring the dough (wheat and white) and a bottle of something.

Easy enough. Jenny was providing sauce, cheese and a salad. Kaitlyn brought toppings, Lisa brought wine, and to tell the truth, I don’t remember what Jane brought, but I know she did something.

 We all showed up just after 7:30 and popped the champagne I had brought—Woohoo! We coooooed over Jane’s puppy, Luna, and eventually decided we should make some pizza.

Jenny had a whole pizza kit that someone had given Tanner and her for a house warming gift. It came complete with stone, slicer, cheese shredder, spices, serving utensils, and oven mitts! I stretched out the dough while Emily (Kaitlyn’s roommate) chopped veggies and shredded cheese. Jenny made the salad…mmmm…walnuts and craisins and cucumber, oh my!

We had one white crust with three sections of toppings—cheese, cheese with pineapple, and cheese with pineapple and broccoli. Our wheat crust had sauce with spinach then cheese and garlic on top. Boy, were they good!

Halfway through eating pizzas one and two, a burner had gotten turned on, on the stove and the plastic handle resting on it melted. This created that wonderful “eau de burnt plastic,” and within two seconds of realizing this, opening windows and fanning out the kitchen, Oldham , Jenny and Tanner's puppy peed on the floor.

Aside from that, no other party foul or catastrophe came upon us. Pizza number three came later, and had half salami, broccoli, onions, and garlic, and half everything but the salami. All was delish!

It was a delightful, relaxing evening and I can’t wait for the next one!

Get Ready For Holiday Houseguests!

So, I have to start getting ready (even though my house is still mid-unpack)because I have a houseguest coming this weekend. My good friend Caroline Cahuantzi is coming to stay for three days! I couldn’t be more excited about it!

 

So, here’s what I think about when I’m having a houseguest:

1. Where will they sleep? I have a futon in the basement living room that’s really plush, so Thursday night I’ll unfold it, put on fresh sheets, a comforter and pillows so that it looks ready for a nice long sleep. I’ll also leave a fresh towel and washcloth along with a bottle of water, just as a nice touch.
2. What should be stocked?
   1. Bathroom: I want to make sure that the bathroom has soap, shampoo and conditioner,       along with toothpaste and toilet paper. I’m sure Caroline will have brought some of her own stuff, but it’s best to make sure I’m not running low on these items just in case       she’s forgotten something.
   2. Kitchen: Since Caroline is spending money on a plane ticket to come and visit, I want to make sure that she doesn’t have to worry about too many expenses while she’s here. I’m guessing we’ll eat at the house a lot so she can save money for other things like going out at night, or anything she’s just dying to buy while she’s up here. Tonight I’ll plan out three dinners (Friday, Saturday and Sunday) and make sure that I have sandwich supplies, and things like cereal, bacon, and eggs for the mornings. I’ll also be sure to stock up on       beverages, and a bottle of wine and some beer so she has a good selection.
3. What will we do?
   1. Friday night we’ll be going to Andrick’s hockey game, and Saturday night we’ll be attending a UVM hockey game, so I have to make sure my tickets are lined up for both games.
   2. Caroline and I are big fans of curling up and watching movies so I want to make sure the living room is clean and comfortable and ready for use.

This is what I’m thinking of so far. I have two nights at home to prepare and I think I’ve got it all under control. Famous last words…

Thanksgiving

Happy Thanksgiving!
I hope you all celebrate and enjoy this holiday.  Personally it's my favorite because it involves no gifts, no over the top commercialism.  Just a day to celebrate and be grateful for the things we've been given in life.  Since I was a kid this has been my favorite holiday, the excellent food, the family, the whole idea of it and the fact that it's not about presents.  I love it to bits and plan to thoroughly enjoy myself.  I hope you do the same, and take an extra spoonful of gravy, it only tastes this good once a year!

More Dinner Party Thoughts

So, I promised you all party pics (and I definitely want to share, especially so you can see the ones from Cass's €œgoing away/birthday/jumping out of a plane costume party because I went as the Chiquita Banana lady (fruit basket hat and all) and Drick was a giant banana. However, with the way things worked out, it'€™ll take a few days before I get to them. (You can click here to see Emily's photos from my dinner party though.) I am back from my trip to San Francisco with Anna. We were working on a couple of business projects which you will be hearing more about in the next two months! Home sweet home. Well, disheveled home, since I'm trying to pack and move most everything this weekend!

The dinner party was a great success (if I do say so myself), and I learned a few lessons as well. Things like dip-chip ratios (my roasted red pepper and walnut dip was far too heavy for my parmesan crisps, both in flavor and actual weight), and apparently I could just serve dumplings because they were gone in literally 20 minutes! Things that surprised me: people showed up on time, and I was only 20 minutes over on my time estimate for getting food finished and onto platters.

Once all the food was out and the majority of guests had arrived, we were all laughing and chatting and pouring wine and champagne. I really enjoy hosting a party that I can be a part of, although I didn't get to spend completely enough time with each of my guests. One of my best buds, for instance, Emily, did a great job at mingling, considering that she only knew my family members at the party. And it reminded me that there are obvious things that a guest should do (say thank you, offer to help, just even showing up in general), and then there are things a guest should do that really help make a party great.

Guests who get involved and really participate, whether it's with food, dancing, events or even just conversation, those guests really help make the party. It's the minglers I'€™d like to talk about for a bit. I know I have a blog on the art of mingling, but it really needs a second shout out. Those guests who move around and strike up conversation with other guests really keep the party alive.

Have trouble starting conversations? Here'™s an easy trick, and it'€™s one I know Em uses all the time: ask a question. Really, it's that simple. If you want to start a conversation with someone, ask a question. €œSo how do you know ­_____ (the host)?"€ "€œWhere do you work?", "€œHave you always lived in this town?"€ Each question you ask will get you an answer you can build on. "Oh, she and I used to go to high school together"€ "€œOh cool, were you two really close then?" "€œWe spent a ton of time together, we actually met though a mutual friend and then realized we were two peas in a pod. How about you, did you meet ___(the host) in college?" "€œNo, actually our parents became good friends a few years ago and that'™s how we became close."€

If you listen to what the other person is saying, you'€™ll find there are a ton of questions you could pose. And have confidence when you ask. The whole umm... errrr...aaaaa... thing, you just don'€™t need it. And even if you are nervous or crowd-shy, think about this: asking questions means you'€™re taking the pressure off of you. You just have to get into the "€œgame"€ of it.  Think of it as a challenge where you want to keep the conversation going€“ comment on the food, the artwork, the drinks, the music, ANYTHING! Even if the party is ten people in a white room with no food, furniture or music, and everyone has to wear the same thing (resist the urge right now to say, "€œI wouldn'€™t go to a party like that!€), then at least you have that entire scenario to comment on or ask questions about. My point simply goes back to confidence-€”have confidence that you can have an opinion, that it'€™s ok to not know everything about food or art or music, you can ask questions of people, and in general other people love to talk about themselves, so run with it! 

My other piece of advice when it comes to being a good guest is don'€™t feign interest. I mean, of course every now and again you get stuck in a dud of a conversation, and have to until you find a way out. Try to think that for the most part you never know what this person will say next that peaks your interest, so give them a chance. And even if they don't, at least you'™ve met them and it'™s another familiar face. One last thing: ENJOY!

Party Tonight---Crazy Day

AAAAAAAAAAAAAaa totally having one of those days!!!!! I was up late last night cooking as much as I could for the party this evening. And, as a result, my kitchen looks like hell. But most of the cooking is done. My ex-boyfriend, who’s moving into my apartment when I move to the house, decided it would be better to move his bed and dresser up last night, instead of Saturday (after the party) because it’s supposed to downpour on Saturday. I can’t blame him, but now there’s stuff in the hallway and I’m having company! I’m sure I’ll find some way to deal, like move it all into the bedrooms for the evening. But still, it’s one of those things you don’t want to have to deal with. (Mum calls that a de-rangement.) I still have to shower and get myself ready as well as clean up the house, and get the last minute things I forgot last night: walnuts, can of tuna, an extra bottle of my favorite champagne, and…..OH YEAH, plastic ware!

 I’ve got music covered though. Andrick left me some of his world music CDs, I love all the Latin ones, so it should be good and will get people moving and feeling jolly. Phone’s ringing (oh my god- sorry couldn’t resist a little Beastie Boys shout out there)—SWEET!!  I just got off the phone with Jenny, and our friend Lisa is back from vacation and is going to come and bring her German friend who’s visiting. Lisa rocks and I’m very happy she’ll be attending (and guest). Especially because for once I’ve made sufficient vegetarian food, and most of my veggies couldn’t make it, so now my vegetarian food has purpose. Thank You, Lisa! (In case you couldn’t guess, Lisa is a vegetarian.)

 What really makes me smile about this whole thing, though, is that Andrick’s hockey try-outs get out at 7:55pm. So he’ll actually be able to make it for most of the party, and that really makes me feel warm and fuzzy. With the exception of a few who can’t make it, all of the people I really love are coming, and it feels like a great way to say good-bye to a place I’ve loved living in for the past two years. (Tomorrow night’s raucous costume/bon voyage party for Cassidy should also be a great send off, I can’t wait to tell you about it on Monday!) Hot damn! Not gonna lie, it’s gonna be a great weekend!